MICRO EP: Choosing love over fear in therapy and life
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I want to talk about what feels like the most fundamental truth about being human, and that's love. To me, therapy is love. The work I do is about aligning with what I believe is the fundamental organizing principle of humanity, that we connect to each other through love. Love is a feeling, but it's also an energy, an experience of something beyond us. What some call God or faith or mystery, I call love.
Many religious and cultural systems claim to be about God but aren't actually loving in their nature. They're about control, telling people how to live, who to love, what's acceptable. They use fear as an organizing principle. We're just as capable of connecting to love as we are vulnerable to having fear dominate us. Love is about acceptance and allowing, not control. Therapy is often a space where people meet themselves in an environment that accepts and allows who they are without having to contort or conform. That's love. When we feel loved, we blossom.
I see love everywhere. In the Springboks, who I believe win not just because of strategy but because Rassie Erasmus leads with love, because the players love each other and South Africa. Not in a nationalistic way, but in a way where our hearts feel warm thinking about this country and each other, even with our differences. I see love in people who've been hurt but stay open, who become loving parents despite their own wounds, who believe another love story might be around the corner. We're naturally loving creatures. We have to be taught to fear. Turn away from anyone who teaches you to live in fear instead of leading with your heart.
Follow Carly on:
Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly
Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw
Many religious and cultural systems claim to be about God but aren't actually loving in their nature. They're about control, telling people how to live, who to love, what's acceptable. They use fear as an organizing principle. We're just as capable of connecting to love as we are vulnerable to having fear dominate us. Love is about acceptance and allowing, not control. Therapy is often a space where people meet themselves in an environment that accepts and allows who they are without having to contort or conform. That's love. When we feel loved, we blossom.
I see love everywhere. In the Springboks, who I believe win not just because of strategy but because Rassie Erasmus leads with love, because the players love each other and South Africa. Not in a nationalistic way, but in a way where our hearts feel warm thinking about this country and each other, even with our differences. I see love in people who've been hurt but stay open, who become loving parents despite their own wounds, who believe another love story might be around the corner. We're naturally loving creatures. We have to be taught to fear. Turn away from anyone who teaches you to live in fear instead of leading with your heart.
Follow Carly on:
Website: https://onthecouchwithcarly.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfBi56xQookfRGL3zvWVzCg
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onthecouchwithcarly/?hl=en
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/onthecouchwithcarly/
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@onthecouchwithcarly
Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/za/podcast/on-the-couch-with-carly/id1497585376
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3t7A2FMnISQ2fz9D5p0Xuw
Chapters
- 00:14 Love as the most universal principle
- 00:50 Therapy is love and connection
- 01:34 Love as God, faith, mystery, truth
- 02:28 When religious systems use control instead of love
- 03:16 Fear as an organizing principle
- 03:43 Systems that make you afraid to control you
- 04:06 Love is acceptance and allowing
- 04:45 We blossom like flowers when loved
- 05:17 The Springboks and Rassie Erasmus leading with love
- 06:27 South Africans love this country differently
- 06:54 United through love despite differences
- 07:21 People who stay open after being hurt
- 08:23 Flawed characters fumbling towards connection
- 08:53 We're naturally loving, taught to fear
- 09:22 Turn away from fear, come back to love
