Asking For A Friend

CATRIONA BOFFARD  |  Podcast , ±47 min episodes every 1 week, 3 days  | 
Ever had a question you felt too embarrassed to ask, and instead asked that question “for a friend”?

Hosted by Clinical Sexologist and Psychotherapist Catriona Boffard, Asking for a Friend brings you fascinating and interesting conversations about sex, intimacy, relationships, and mental and physical health. In each episode, Catriona will bring you evidence-based information and real-world advice on topics that are not often discussed but that we really need to normalise and talk more about. She’s joined by special guests who are all experts in their fields or have lived experiences of these topics. Follow Catriona on Instagram at @sexologywithcatriona

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Q & A - S1E12

I can’t believe we’re at the end of season 1 and the final episode. I want to end each season with a Q&A episode. So there’s no guest today; just me answering some questions you sent in to me or asked me in person after bumping into each other (masked and socially distanced of course).

This season has seen me talk to leading experts about everything from sexual pleasure to perinatal mental health issues. From erections to sexual pain. I’ve spoken to incredible experts and I’m eternally grateful for their time and knowledge that they have so generously shared with me and you, my listeners.
In this episode, these are the questions I address. I hope that you find one or some of them interesting. And who knows, maybe there’s something you would have ‘asked for a friend?’

1. Does my lack of sexual experience matter to men? Do they care? Is it weird?
2. Why I find it hard to “get in tune” sometimes?
3. Eating disorders and the impact/ link with sex?
3. Why do some people like hurting the other during sex? Isn’t that abusive/ psychological reasons?
4. Is it normal that I’ve never had a vaginal orgasm but my gf has them all the time?
5. Whether sex with a larger woman is as pleasurable to men?
6. What impact do antidepressants have on me sexually?

If you’d like to ask something for a friend, get in touch with me!

HPV: what we all need to know with Dr Mpume Zenda - S1E11

Every year, I get a reminder to have my pap smear. But do you know why you need to do this? And did you know that having your pap smear is only testing for a few strains of the sexually transmitted infection, human papillomavirus (HPV)? This week’s episode delves into this topic with the wonderful and brilliant gynaecologist Dr Mpume Zenda. Dr Mpume is a passionate OB-Gynae-Sexologist, practicing in Johannesburg. She has a social media presence and is passionate about providing solutions to Sexual and Reproductive Health & Wellness through connecting Media and Medicine.

We bust myths, tell you what you really need to know, break down what HPV is and talk a little about how we wish things would change in order to eradicate cervical cancer. We speak a lot to the experiences of womxn, but this episode is for everyone!

You can find Dr Mpume on Instagram @dr.gynae. She sees patients in Sandton, Johannesburg.

Perinatal mental health with Tamlyn Anderson - S1E10

Catriona and her guest, clinical psychologist Tamlyn Anderson, talk about perinatal mental health and the uncomfortable truths about motherhood that often aren’t spoken about. This episode focuses on the impact on a woman’s mind and body during labour and the 4th trimester, how one’s partner is affected, and what we can do as women to really take care of ourselves during this major life transition. You can follow Tamlyn on Instagram @tamlyn_anderson

Unwanted sexual thoughts with Aoife Drury - S1E9

Ever wondered if you’re the only one who gets those unwanted, strange thoughts that come into your head unexpectedly… You know the one’s I’m talking about. Crashing your car? Imagining everyone naked? What about something as upsetting as having sexual thoughts about to children? In this weeks episode, psychosexual and relationship therapist Aoife Drury and I delve into a topic that is definitely not spoken about enough. We explore how these thoughts are always unwanted and cause someone immense distress, and what the difference is between the random intrusive thoughts we all get everyday, and the immense distress that thoughts like this can cause and what behaviour they can result in.

Aoife is a Psychosexual and Relationship Therapist and is currently carrying out a Doctorate in Psychotherapy. With a BSc and Msc in psychiatry Aoife has always had an interest in intrusive thoughts, with a particular focus on the shame associated with sexual ones. Aoife runs her practice online seeing both couples and individuals. You can find her amazing work on Instagram at @drurytherapy.

Expanding male sexuality with Cam Fraser - S1E8

“Get it up, get it in, and get if off”… sound like the usual narrative that exists around male sexuality? This week I chat to sex coach and sexologist Cam Fraser, about how men can learn to deepen their understanding of their own sexuality that goes far beyond the beliefs that pop culture, porn and society have us believe. He speaks about his own journey into becoming a sexologist, being a man in a female-dominated field, and how he helps men to work on shifting to an alternative view of their sexuality.
Cam is on Instagram @thecamfraser, and he has his own fantastic podcast: Men, sex & pleasure with Cam Fraser

Sex Workers with Dr Jenny Coetzee - S1E7

*A warning on this episode – some of the things that Jenny speaks about could be triggering. A warning for sensitive listeners.

This is a topic that most of us (including myself) know little about, and yet when I interviewed Dr Jenny Coetzee – a highly experienced public health researcher – I knew I wanted to share what I’d learnt. Despite sex work apparently being the world’s oldest profession, most people hold particular opinions about sex workers, and don’t have a enough understanding of what it’s really like and what sex workers in low income areas might experience and be exposed to. Jenny shares the human side of sex work with me, and her fascinating findings of the research she’s done in South Africa. This is a real and honest conversation, and Jenny doesn’t sugar coat things about the experiences these female sex workers go through.

You can find out more about the Africa Potential Foundation here:

The Future of Sex Tech with Bryony Cole - S1E6

Sex and tech… what on earth is that all about you might be wondering? On today’s episode, I dive into this fascinating topic with sex futurist and entrepreneur Bryony Cole, to find out how technology can be used to improve our sexual experience, report sexual assault, help us overcome sexual difficulties and even teach us how to sextet. We delve into the fear of technology taking over, how it cannot replace human connection, and how we can use tech to enhance our sexual experience.

You can find Byrony on Instagram @futureofsex, and her podcast is Future of Sex.

Breast cancer & sexuality with Prof Elna McIntosh - S1E5

October is breast cancer, so Catriona discusses a topic we rarely speak about in relation to this – sexuality. Prof Elna McIntosh, a clinical sexologist and a woman who has beaten breast cancer twice, speaks about everything from nipple tattoos and body image to self-pleasure and the need for early detection. Catriona and Elna also discuss using and accessing other resources to bring the experience of pleasure back into one’s life.

You can reach out to Prof McIntosh via her Instagram page @disa_clinic

Desir, South Africa’s leading sexual health and wellness brand, is on Instagram @desir_official, and Dipsea, where you can listen to wonderful audio erotica, is @dipseastories and through your app store.

Vaginismus with Lisa Mackenzie from the Vaginismus Network - S1E4

Vaginismus is not something we get taught about during sex ed. Yet this female sexual pain condition is actually rather common, with statistics showing us that somewhere in the range of 1-17% of women globally are struggling with it. It’s something I work extensively with in my practice. I’m joined this week by Lisa from The Vaginismus Network, to talk about her own personal experience of vaginismus, as well as why her and Kat started the platform.

You can reach out to Lisa and the team at The Vaginismus Network via Instagram @thevagnetwork or on their website

Sex and anxiety with Kate Moyle - S1E3

If there was ever an unhappy couple, it would be sex and anxiety. In this week’s episode, Catriona talks to UK psycho-sexologist Kate Moyle about how much anxiety impacts our sex life, and what we can do to try and manage it better. Catriona and Kate talk about comparison culture, expectation vs. reality, and what we can do to manage our anxiety around sex better.

You can reach out to Kate via her Instagram page @katemoyletherapy. Her podcast, Sexual Wellness Sessions, is available on all major podcast platforms.

Erectile dysfunction with Mojo Men - S1E2

Catriona talks about erectile dysfunction with the founders of a platform called Mojo Men, Angus and Xander. Mojo Men aims to help young men who are struggling with their erectile functioning, help them realise that they are not alone, and provide a platform that both Xander and Angus wish they had themselves. Mojo Men offers real-world guidance and advice from experienced health care professionals to help men overcome erectile difficulties. In this podcast, they open up about how erectile dysfunction affected them personally and why, and talk about how this quite common experience could affect young men. Find out more about Mojo Men on their website or on Instagram

The right to sexual pleasure with Dr T S1E1

Catriona speaks to Dr Tlatleng Mofokeng (Dr T), about the right to sexual pleasure. Dr T is a medical doctor and best-selling author, and a trailblazer in the South African sexual health community. She’s also forged a path in international sexual health and reproductive rights; most recently by being appointed as a special rapporteur to the United Nations. We speak about sexual pleasure and what we should be taught about it growing up. You can follow Dr T on Instagram @Drtlaleng and read her amazing book Dr T: A Guide to Sexual Health and Pleasure.

37 episodes

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